Back Home

 It's not uncommon to find me sitting in my bedroom, earphones in, listening to a song with tears streaming down my face.  It is uncommon, however, for a song to do that to me repeatedly.  
    As my 17th birthday swiftly approaches, I find myself doing more reflecting than I ever have before.  I'm a fairly quiet, reflective person who tends to over complicate things.  It's not necessarily something I'm proud of, but it's something I've embraced.
    On Tuesday, Megan and Liz, the powerful pop-duo that I've followed for 6 years now, released a new song, "Back Home".  The release of this song couldn't have come at a better time.  In 13 days, I'm headed to Nashville, TN to start touring colleges.  The reality of life is coming at me...fast.
    As I think about leaving my town, I find myself emotional.  I've always wanted to leave...right?  I mean, how can I chase my dream in a tiny town in the middle of nowhere?  But how am I supposed to leave my family?  Or the little 2-year-old girl who is my world?  I don't want to miss everyone growing up.  But I also don't want to miss my chance to live my dream.
I feel like there's a lot of people out there facing this same thing.  Trying to find where they belong, what they're supposed to do.  With so many opportunities and choices to make, it can get overwhelming way too quickly.
    Tuesday night, I waited till I got in bed around 9:30 (I know, I go to bed so early) before I turned on the song.  The tune immediately put me at peace and I felt myself being drawn into the song.  By the time the second verse came up, where it talks about getting "lost on every turn" and being "not from around here" but "from a thousand miles away", the tears started streaming.  Would I feel lost every day in Nashville?  Would I miss everything I left behind?  Or would I know "I'm where I'm meant to be [...] living my dream"?  I composed myself and pressed play again.  I took deep, slow breaths.  I bit my tongue.  Nothing helped.  There I was, crying again.  The next morning while straightening my hair, I decided to play it again.  Was that a bad call?  Completely.  My emotions got the best of me, as usual.  It's happened so many times this week.  "Back Home" has taken everything I've been trying to put into words for the past 6 months and said it beautifully.  
    Over the past 6 years, Megan and Liz have always managed to be on the same wavelength as me.  "Are You Happy Now" was released at the height of my suffering from bullying.  "All We Have Again" was released as my best friend and I drifted apart.  I feel as if I've grown up with them and that personal relationship makes things even more emotional.
    All of you out there that feel like you're growing up too fast, I'm right there with you.  The "real world" is a scary thing.  We've been sheltered and taken care of all our lives, but soon, we're going to be responsible for what does and doesn't happen.  Through listening and reflecting on "Back Home", I've started to relax and feel more comfortable with what's happening.  I've realized that I'm not the only one feeling this way.  I hope you realize that too.

It may be a big world out there, but we're going to change it.  All of us. Together.

Fearlessly,
Sarah